she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Randomize
