walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
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