Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
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