Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
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