I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Randomize
