So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
