Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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