did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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