just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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