so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
