Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
