Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
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