Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Randomize