so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
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I think weed is turning my hair brown
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving