My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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