I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
