I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize