i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
All I could think of during that funeral was how great I look in a suit, how creepy catholics are, and how horny I am.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
