He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
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