so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize
