theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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