I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
πππ what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Randomize