we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
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