you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
you told grandpa to call you daddy
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Randomize
