I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
