so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Randomize