Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
