I wish I only lived at night.
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize