I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
