At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
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