So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down.
Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you’ve lived so long is a sign that anything is possible.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
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