Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
foreskin is a definite game changer
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
Randomize