I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
