I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
I'm currently hiding from this horrific thing that we call adulthood. If anyone needs me, I'll be smoking a bowl in the bouncy house.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
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