carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Randomize
