He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
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you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
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I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I want a musical about memes.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
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