He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Randomize