i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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