i wish starbucks made bloody marys
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Randomize
