awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
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