do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
