It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
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