Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
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