this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
it was like eating out sand paper
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
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I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
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Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.