I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
Randomize
