why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
kristin has been a bad kristin
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Randomize
