I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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