if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
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