he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Randomize
