I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
